To all my loved ones,

I consider myself most blessed to have you in my life. Thanks for your love and support.

How is it we can be so happy one day and devastated the next? Not sure if I can do this anymore. Tragedy is too hard for me. The other day Paul said, "Wow, there have been a lot of deaths lately." Nope, this is the norm. Death is extremely common here. Their response to death is in having total faith of a better afterlife. It's quite inspiring.
Tragedy stuck close to home this week. You know how much I love my guards who are also preparing for their missions. When Lawrence showed up for work at 9:00pm he was totally fine and we had a little chat before I shut the door for the evening. Luckily a few other guys were in my courtyard doing homework with my power outlets and wifi. At 9:30 they heard a thump...Lawrence had fallen to the ground. His breathing was super rapid and he was seizing. We rushed him to my 15 minutes of fame dreaded hospital just a block away for them to diagnosis malaria. I stayed with him until he was well sedated with their concoction. The next morning I was shocked to see him at my door. As he walked in I could tell he was still really sick. Within minutes he was unconscious so we hauled his dead weight back to the hospital once again. I pleaded with them to take really good care of him. But as soon as he woke up they sent him home again. A couple hours later I received a phone call from his family saying he was totally blind. It would not be easy to be blind here. I can barely manage the dirt roads and I can see. It has been devastating for me. My sorrow is heavy not just for him but for all of them.


Hospitals are so limited here. There are only 5 surgeons in the country. The nearest outdated x-ray machine is 2 hours away. An ultrasound is unheard of. Sierra Leone has the highest maternal mortality rate in the world. One in 17 mothers die during pregnancy or childbirth and 7% of babies don't survive the first year of life. Those numbers are higher out where we live. I really hate this part of my mission. I am sad.

It's weird to feel such extremes.

Luckily we spend a lot of time preparing missionaries with the needed paperwork, passports, National ID cards, clothing etc. which is my favorite part and does bring me much joy. As you might see, this ends up being a tedious, somewhat frustrating process. Note in the photo one worker asleep and the stacks and stacks and stacks of files from ceiling to floor. A picture says 1,000 words.


The other day I went out to collect my laundry from the clothes line. I couldn't stop laughing when I saw one of my guards who beat me to it. Now that's using your head. They carry EVERYTHING from a Book of Mormon to 100 pound stack of wood on their heads.


Paul commented on how he gets wet around his collar. I won't give him a pity party. The hottest place in Sierra Leone is my kitchen. A small walk in closet and no fan. When the oven's on, the kitchen is the oven. Yesterday I did prep for a few meals. Dripping sweat was just part of each cuisine. We've had unseasonably hot weather so when it says it "feels like 117" I feel like it's too hot to eat. Because remember I cook all we eat. Too hot to eat except for our new splurge. I found Cadbury fruit and nut chocolate bars and Pepsi in the Capital. Somehow that is a perfect meal that soothes the pain. I pray it doesn't become a dreadfully wonderful addiction. Paul keeps dropping pounds and somehow I don't. Let's not tell him I've been sneaking extra rationed chocolate.

I don't know if it's the heat or what but my heart melts for these kids. And there are always kids around. They have the most beautiful smiles.

Hopefully you can pull up the video of kids singing. I have no idea how to load it.

My heart is certainly full. Pretty much stuffed. I have more gratitude for the things that really matter. My connection with heaven being number one. I've needed that comfort. I've needed that direction. And most importantly, I've enjoyed that love. God has been by my side every step of this journey. May I praise Him to all, forever.