Talking comes naturally to some people and not so naturally to others. As you can probably guess, it comes pretty naturally to me. But believe it or not, I do still find myself without words sometimes, and most commonly when I’m with Ammon. Crazy, right? It’s just that sometimes I feel like I already know everything there is to know about Ammon. But then we start talking and I find that I feel totally out of the loop with him! Can you relate?
I think that we sometimes forget that we’ve become different people since we were first married. We feel like we already got to know each other and that part of the relationship is over, when in fact, we’re always changing and evolving. That’s one of the beautiful things about life and relationships; we have the ability to continually become better versions of ourselves and support our loved ones as they do the same. I don’t want to miss out on any of the amazing versions of Ammon that are yet to come because I got too comfortable and didn’t take the time to connect with him. Focusing on that has helped me see my relationship in a whole new light.
A SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE REQUIRES FALLING IN LOVE MANY TIMES, ALWAYS WITH THE SAME PERSON.
- MIGNON MCLAUGHLIN
Connection in any relationship is so important. It’s the little conversations that add up. The little moments that make a lasting impact. I thought I’d write down a list of deeper questions you can ask your significant other anytime you have 10 minutes together. It’s made a huge difference to our relationship over this last year as I have tried to ask about deeper topics with Ammon. We always end up chatting for much longer when I ask thoughtful questions and it has grown our love in many ways.
Because this has been such a game changer for us I decided to compile 50 questions that’ll spark conversation and help you get to know anyone more deeply. Whether it’s the first date or your 50th anniversary, it’s never too late to get to know your partner a little better.
- What is the hardest thing you’re going through right now? How can I help?
- What can I do better to validate you as a partner or friend?
- What is something on your “bucket list” that you haven’t done, and why is it important to you?
- What are your top 3 favorite things we do together?
- If you could have any profession in the world, what would it be?
- What are your favorite talents/hobbies you have?
- What is something you daydream about?
- If you had 10 hours of uninterrupted time and unlimited money, what would you do?
- What is one thing you wish you knew how to do?
- What 3 things give you anxiety?
- What 3 things bring you joy?
- What is something you know is good for you but you hate doing?
- Fill in the blank – I would give up _______ for ________.
- Do you feel fulfilled? What prevents you from feeling fulfilled? What makes you feel fulfilled?
- Would you rather have more money or more time? What would you do with more of what you picked?
- What is the most important thing you did today?
- What is something you know 100% is true?
- What do you consider to be your core values?
- If you had to get a tattoo right now, what would it be and why?
- If we had to move out of state, which state would you move to and why?
- What is your dream vacation? Tell me where we would go and what we would do.
- When was the last time you felt deeply loved and how was that shown to you?
- Do you know that I love you or I’m trying to love you?
- How do you show me that you love me?
- What is a secret you haven’t told many people?
- What is your biggest fear?
- What is stopping you from living a better life?
- What are the most important ways to connect to me and how can I best connect to you?
- What is one thing you would die for?
- What are the 3 most important qualities in a friend?
- Do you feel alone? Why?
- Do you feel scared? Why?
- If you went to a therapist what is something you’d talk to them about?
- What types of feelings do you experience while we’re intimate?
- Can I be a better lover to you? How?
- What is something you wish I focused on more?
- What is something you wish you knew sooner?
- What is your biggest regret?
- What is one thing you want to accomplish this month and how can I help you do it?
- What is something you want less of? How can we take more things off your plate?
- If we could hire someone to do something for you weekly or daily or yearly, what would it be?
- Will you stare into my eyes for 1 full minute and tell me what you love about me?
- Will you hold my hand and tell me why you married me?
- Can I tell you 10 reasons why I love you?
- What are you really enjoying lately?
- What is something you’re the most proud of doing in the last month?
- What is a skill you wish you had?
- What would you tell your 10-year-old self if you could? What about your 80-year-old self?
- What is your favorite part of the day and why? Favorite part of the week?
- What makes us a good team?
I hope you all start some wonderful conversations with your loved ones this week. And please share your favorite questions for getting a conversation started in the comments. Love you!
xo,
Abi
1 comment
Love this Abby! You somehow are able to meet people where they’re at in such a non- judgemental way yet at the same time encourage us to do better and show the way to growth in these areas. Love you!